If you’re a working parent, toddler hitting can be the death of your childcare. If you are a stay at home Mom, it could mean no more birthday parties.
So what can you do?
Some children are naturally livelier and more excitable than others. Although boisterous, you should be able to control their behavior.
To a young toddler, it can be funny to see mommy suddenly bolt upright or for a playmate to start crying.
Toddlers may also bite because they’re teething or because they put everything in their mouths anyway, so why not someone’s arm? It could even be something as simple as hunger.
So how do you teach your child not to bite?
Why Do Toddlers Hit And Bite?
The majority of toddlers engage in some biting between their first and third birthdays.
Probably the most common reason is that toddlers usually don’t know how to talk yet.
It is one of the few ways of communicating that’s effective for them before verbal skills are developed. However, not all children bite. Some choose other forms of communication, such as grabbing, shoving, or punching.
Another reason toddlers bite is to express frustration.
7 Tips To Stop Toddler Hitting
Toddlers are full of surprises. Chances are one day, if it hasn’t happened already, your precious little love bug is going to haul off and hit someone. It might even be you.
All of a sudden your delightful child has become a boxer in training. Here’s how to stop your toddler from hitting.
Regardless of the age, there are some strategies out there for keeping that kind of behavior – temper tantrums, screaming, etc. – from becoming completely out of control. Here are some tips.
#1 Don’t make it a game.
Almost all toddlers hit. They don’t have the communication tools they need to express themselves, and eventually, frustration or even curiosity will turn into a hit. When they hit someone, whether it is an adult or a child, immediate action is required. It’s important to let your child know that hitting isn’t allowed.
Do not laugh, smirk or give your child any attention for the behavior other than to let them know hitting isn’t okay.
When you give them too much attention for the behavior – either positive or negative, they’re more likely to repeat the offense. They repeat the behavior partly because they received attention for it, and partly to test and see if they’ll receive the same reaction a second time.
#2 Don’t hit them back.
Hitting them back actually reinforces the hitting and aggressive behavior. You’ll end up with a child that hits consistently to get what they want.
#3 Provide your child with other ways to communicate.
One of the primary causes of hitting is that a toddler lacks the communication skills to get what they need. They may hit for fun or out of anger. It’s not necessarily an act of aggression. Help your child learn new ways to ask for what they want. If, for example, they want to play with a child, teach them the way to ask. Maybe instead of hitting, they can give the child a toy.
#4 Recognize the signs.
Does your child hit when they’re tired, frustrated, excited, or bored? Pay attention to their behavior and emotions when the hitting incidences occur. You’ll be able to help manage the hitting better if you understand when and why it occurs.
#5 Navigate hitting situations with care.
Be on high alert when you’re in a situation where your child may hit. For example, if you take them to a playgroup once a week and they generally hit other children, then it’s time to stick close to them and prevent any hitting. If you’re able to catch their hand as they’re getting ready to hit, you can teach them quickly that it’s not acceptable.
#6 What about punishment?
Each parent has their own method for discipline. Time outs are often successful. It’s also important to make sure the child makes amends to the person they hit. Learning to apologize is a good skill. Additionally, it helps your toddler learn to empathize. Empathy is a skill that won’t come until later, but it’s never too soon to demonstrate good behavior.
#7 Remove your child from the situation.
If your toddler is just being downright defiant and the no hitting message isn’t getting through, it may be time to remove them from the situation. This is particularly important if they’re hitting other children. If a short time out doesn’t work, then you can stop taking them to playgroup until they’ve learned to get their hitting habit under control.
Toddlers hit; it’s often part of their development. That doesn’t mean it’s acceptable. Set firm ground rules, teach proper behaviors, and have patience. It won’t be the first time your child behaves in an inappropriate manner. Start setting the foundation now.
Teach Your Toddler To Do Better
Make it perfectly clear that the biting is hurtful and wrong and point out to your child how much pain their biting has caused. Express that biting is wrong and unacceptable and that neither mommy nor daddy likes it.
Experts agree that parents should try not to give biting so much attention that it becomes an attention-getter. This is true of all behavior that you don’t want to see repeated. Firmly tell the child again that there is no biting allowed, that it is wrong, and that it hurts people.
